Saturday 14th January
Thinking back to my childhood memories and the links to my chosen career path. My most empowering memory was when I was seven, I was in my bedroom playing with my typewriter. My Uncle was visiting and he was in the with my mother and other relatives in the kitchen. I could hear them all gabbing like geese catching up with who's died, married born and footsteps coming towards my bedroom. I got a bad feeling about hearing him coming towards my room so I hid in the wardrobe. He must have heard the keys of the typewriter stop and the door of my hiding place shut, because he found me and had a quick feel of me through my clothes and up my skirt while chatting away to me asking how I was.
Years later the power didn't hit me until I saw him again. I was sixteen and walked into my grandmothers house, and there he was, my uncle.
As I looked at him my grandmother asked,"Do you remember who this is?"
I kept my eyes on him and said, "Yes, I remember when I was little and I was in the wardrobe hiding from him."
He looked at me and chuckled, "No you couldn't have remembered me because you were too young."
I looked at his new young wife, and her two beautiful young little girls and all I could think was, "I wonder if he has fucked them yet?"
Oh well, just seeing the panic in his eyes was enough for me. I felt satisfied to the point of skipping out of the house smirking to myself. I wonder what he was thinking, ha-ha.
I don't see this or what happened to me as a bad thing, not in the slightest. I believe that everything happens for a reason, and I learned from it. I don't hate him in anyway or wish it never happened, it made me feel normal. Maybe I should explain. After the confrontation I plucked up the courage to say something to my auntie about what had happened to me when I was seven, and when I told her she casually said,"Oh don't worry about it, he tried to shag me when I was younger, but your granny had a word with him."
That was the day I realized I was the only sane person in my fathers side of the family.